Val enters the frozen mind

I seem to recall a man bent on hunting down those who set flames to the fortress, to right the wrongs done and each time I try to bring back those feelings, they seem to have faded. And I have a frozen mind, a mind that knows this is not what should be, how happy and carefree my days and alas I am not actually joyful and my happiness is fleeting and dissipates like the night, cold wet and shivering I am inside thought I cannot explain why. Have I not adapted?