stoic, steadfast to the end

horror speaks, the mind listens. the mind adapts, the body shifts to a different plane, horror no longer speaks, for the mind is not in conflict, with horror. feels like love, it is love is it not? horror stays silent, grinning like a fool in love, for horror has found a mate! a mate for life, who took some coaxing, some nudges, some persuasive tactics - and there is no horror "i" becomes the protagonist, how can there be horror in "i"? while "you" must be the problem, how can it not be? and horror grins at this logic, it is seductive, charming, classy even that a mater has evolved so, such progress, what genius, for "i" can do anything, be anything, but never be damned. how can "i" be? when "you" label, judge, nudge, how unruly, how ridiculous, how insolent! me, me, me it is all about me, with me sinking into the earth 3 feet, 5 feet, still i grin, like horror's grin when the mirror broke, and horror knew his mate no longer needed a reflection. subdued, quiet, noble even with calm grace meeting 6 feet, still smiling with the sound of pleasure knocking on the limbic system, floods - like a train entering a tunnel, floods - that must be the other side of heaven, the backdoor: for pearly gates was only one entrance, everyone knows that 6 feet now and i grinned at having always gained the upper hand. outside downcast, inside jubilant, outside weeping, inside rejoicing, outside beating of the breast, inside godlike. i won, i won, i won!