could i? could you?

you said to speak truth while holding a gun. when a gun meant something when skin tears, flesh erodes, heart fails to believe in values. what for? each skins that tears, each flesh that breaks each heart broken again, all the while you nod, as if in understanding, of. what. i do not comprehend, neither do you you do a part of you shut down, for stirring that awareness erases you - mighty you, might, you've lived it a long time, feels good i suppose. which is why reason fails, when reason is dull when pleasure if heaven, and heaven is unreal, it matters not. for today, the knees will bow, you say that is because you are right, i say it was a gun you say it was a choice i say it was coercion, you say it was faith and spin it to something fantastical, i say it was blasphemy, you say it was my wayward self talking. talking to myself, talking to yourself as strength leaks, weakness is felt speaker and audience, captive and assailant feel the weakness, like gravity - i regret, i forgive when there in nothing left to regret or forgive. time sweeps in, like a tsunami leaving our shore without sand. only rocks, of what can stand the test of waves, and when the waves are gone? it is only you and me, still spinning stories of what was, what is, what could be. that's something, something real, something of a gun really though this gun is time, of stories wrestling together in infinite age ageless time. judgement delayed when this tug of war is played out each of us telling the other side, "you're wrong:" one of us surely must be. judgement delayed, the stars bear witnesses to our eternal struggle. could i, could you and we both already know only one of us is right when compromise means the delayed verdict we both wished was not.